(based on the kind of books I read)

Best Authors:

Thriller/Suspense Category
Steve Berry > Dan Brown

Now, before you shoot me, I am going to explain. Based on writing style, Steve wins hands down. His books are fast-paced, and the way he cuts his chapters then switches character scenes makes you yearn for the next page. When it comes to plot, Steve still wins. His books are a true blend of fact and fiction. You won't be able to tell it apart. The main difference between both authors is that you won't get disappointed when you finish Steve's books. Promise, you won't ever get disappointed. Okay, I can be shot now.

Vampire Category
Anne Rice > Stephanie Meyer and every other vampire fiction author

...do I even need to explain this?! Fine, I will. When you read any of Anne Rice's vampire novels, you won't believe her characters are vampires. If you take away the fact that they're immortal and that they drink blood, you would just see ordinary people doing extraordinary things with extraordinary habits, like Marius's keen interest in history and books; Vittorio's insane love for all things angelic (and things painted by Fra Fillipo Lippi); Louis's loss for his child, Claudia; and of course Lestat and his narcissistic tendencies. They are highly believable. They are not the archaic stereotype of vampires who have capes, wear all-black and have prominent widow's peaks. They are...colorful, dynamic in such a way that they grow in each book. Each character has a start, and as the unread pages grow fewer, they mature into their true selves. For example, in the first book, Interview with the Vampire, Lestat was portrayed as a heartless bastard who killed whenever and whoever he wanted. As the series progresses, he changes. Anne Rice's vampires are human, in a way, because they trip and fall and learn from their mistakes. They are not portrayed as sparkling gods who are said to be the epitome of blood-sucking perfection. The greatest thing Anne Rice's vampires have over all fictional vampires: they all have flaws and they're not afraid to show it. Instead, Anne Rice uses their flaws and mistakes to make you empathize with them. All of Stephanie's characters are flatter than my pug Dudley's nose. Bella is the same from the first book to the last. Edward's so-called "perfection" is his very flaw. You will never be able to relate to Stephanie's characters because the pedestal Stephanie and every Twi-hard put them on is too high to reach. Don't get me wrong, Poppy Z. Brite's Zillah and Chelsea Quinn Yarbro's St.-Germain were close. Very close.

Mary Sue Category
Sherrilyn Kenyon > Laurell K. Hamilton > Charlaine Harris

Mary sues. Such a word could turn off any reader. But let's stop poking fun at them and see why Sherrilyn Kenyon wins this one. You see, all Sherrilyn Kenyon's Dark/Dream/Were-hunter x Human books run along a single plotline, which goes as follows:

    • Prologue in which Dark Hunter's past is revealed.
    • Mortal love interest is introduced
    • Mortal love interest sees Dark Hunter and gets horny thoughts
    • Dark Hunter sees mortal love interest and gets horny thoughts
    • The two interact and end up together
    • Antagonist devises plan to kidnap mortal love interest in order to kill Dark Hunter
    • Dark Hunter and antagonist fight to the death and somehow either the Dark Hunter or the mortal love interest end up dying
    • If mortal love interest is dying: Dark Hunter curses friends who supposedly can bring mortal love interest back to life
    • If Dark Hunter is dying: Mortal love interest is given the soul of Dark Hunter and is to free him with her true and unconditional love
    • In the end, they are brought back to life or weren't dying in the first place and they end up immortal.
    • Fin.

    'Nuff said.


    1. +JMJ+

      I will take your word on Steve Berry. =)

      * * *

      The interesting thing about Anne Rice's vampires is that their vampirism is completely incidental to their characters. They, too, get to "work out [their] salvation in fear and trembling"--they just have more time in which to do so and much less to have faith in. That's a very dark place to be, figuratively speaking--and Rice was a genius to make it a literal reality for her characters as well.

      * * *

      Hmmmmm. I have a soft spot in my heart for Mary Sues. =) I'm still recovering from that awful Medieval novella which Sherrilyn Kenyon wrote as Kinley MacGregor, but I suppose I could get into the Dark Hunter books this summer.

      There's another Paranormal Romance author I could recommend to you, but your mother would have my neck! =P

    2. @Enbrethiliel:
      > If you go Dark Hunter, there's no going back!
      > It's true what you say about Anne's vamps. It's really like they exist!
      > By any chance is that ParaRomance author LAURELL K. HAMILTON? XD rotflmao

    3. +JMJ+

      No, it is not Laurell K. Hamilton! =P And that's the last I'm going to say about her until you come of age . . .

      Nice new template, by the way! =)


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